The Takoma League

Dear Readers,

The Takoma Park City Council made the surprise announcement that most of the councilmembers have recently acquired extraordinary powers and were forming a league of super heroes.
Mayor Bruce “Captain Takoma” Williams made the announcement at the special work session April 1. He introduced each councilmember present by his super-hero nomenclature and a brief description of his new power: Doug “Neatman” Barry (ability to clean up neighborhoods with a blast of his super-breath), Dan “Enviroman” Robinson (shrinks carbon footprints with his Frostovision), and Reuben “Snipperman” Snipper (able to cut red tape with his new scissor-bladed appendages), and Terry “The Suit” Seamens (supermodel). Councilmember Colleen Clay said she needed no additional special powers or name – “I’m already a mom!”

Strangely absent was councilmember Josh Wright. And the rest of the council refused to explain his whereabouts. Your Gilbert wonders if the rumors are true – that there is something more than an uncanny resemblance between Wright and the infamous Doctor Horrible!

Following the announcement, the council deliberated for four hours about what their super-hero league should be called. They eventually settled on a draft version of the name, ‘The Takoma Park Community Project for Sustainability, Livability, and Environmentally Positive Development and Community-Oriented Safety, Outreach, and Recreational Opportunities Project, but they didn’t feel the name adequately conveyed their entire mission, so they asked for a staff review and recommendations for lengthening it.

The council then adjourned and, colorful capes billowing in the cool night air, flew off to their secret headquarters.

– Gilbert.

About the Author

Gilbert is the pseudonym of a hard-bitten, hard-drinking, long-time Takoma Park resident who maintains the granolapark blog. Gilbert and William L. Brown — Granola Park's mild-mannered chief of staff, researcher, and drink pourer — have never been seen in the same place at the same time.

3 Comments on "The Takoma League"

  1. Anonymous | April 1, 2009 at 8:36 am |

    what a crock of crap

  2. April Won | April 1, 2009 at 9:50 am |

    I believe every word!

  3. i mean the entire council – let’s do something for the planet and reduce our carbon footprint as well as the methane release and can this city – a consumate waste of time and resources

Comments are closed.