GRANOLAPARK: Nerds or not?

YOU R EMBARRAZING

GRANOLAPARK • BY GILBERT

Dear Readers,

This is a crucial time.

This very moment events are unfolding nationwide and perhaps worldwide that will answer  – in September – the vital question.

Is the new Takoma Park city council as nerdy as the old one?

Four of the seven council are new since their last summer recess. Will the new majority follow in their predecessor’s flip-flop sandals? Will they continue to play the role of Embarrassing Parents to the city’s Teenager?

Will they, in other words, spend their vacations wandering the city halls and public works departments of their holiday-destination cities, shop-talking with contemporaries, swapping city code tips, stopping their cars in the middle of traffic so they can get out and measure speed hump heights. Writing it all down, of course, for their what-nerdy-thing-I-did-on-my-summer-vacation report at the first city council fall meeting.

And – letting everybody in earshot know they are a CITY COUNCILMEMBER from TAKOMA PARK, MD!

Mom, Dad, you’re EM-BARRASSING us! Can’t you just go to the beeeeeeeeeech? OHmygawd.

But, maybe this new batch of city councilmembers will be of a different type – one that actually vacations, leaving their city governerdiness behind. This hope sustains us.

Meanwhile, through August, as we all practice our cringing, Your Gilbert will be catching you Dear Readers up with the end of the council’s summer session. We will also be taking the mainstream media to task for recent outrages against our dear city. Stay tuned!

– Gilbert

About the Author

Gilbert
Gilbert is the pseudonym of a hard-bitten, hard-drinking, long-time Takoma Park resident who maintains the granolapark blog. Gilbert and William L. Brown — Granola Park's mild-mannered chief of staff, researcher, and drink pourer — have never been seen in the same place at the same time.

4 Comments on "GRANOLAPARK: Nerds or not?"

  1. One thing about a previous column: Jarrett Smith is not the only freshman on the council. He’s the fourth. He’s just more of a newbie than the others. First term=freshman, just as first season=rookie. The newly elected members will only be “veterans” after they complete a term.

    Bruce Williams, therefore, is a “grizzled veteran,” just like you’re a “hard-bitten, hard-drinking, long-time Takoma Park resident.”

  2. Harrumph. And you, Steve, are a pedant.

  3. We have to stop meeting this way.

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